I can recall times when I attended workshops, remained fully present and took copious notes — and yet, despite my best efforts, I had only incorporated a few valuable takeaways. Does this sound familiar? Back then, I wondered where did I go wrong? Even efforts to be more courageous and tame the fear of failure did not alleviate the problem. Too often, I exited a workshop like a high- speed train, overjoyed as if I had found the missing pearl of wisdom, only to come to a shrieking stop within a relatively short period.
Why did this keep happening? And more importantly, what could I do to change the script so my business could reap the benefits of invested money and time? After taking in new concepts, how much you know about the topic has changed, but you have not. How you can change to incorporate change is a step you may not have realized was missing.
Leaders, part of your success hinges on learning and practicing the strategies you need to become a change expert. I have introduced the Nine Stages of Change and several Change Proficiencies through my Leaders and Change series. Like a GPS, the stages identify where you are in processing a change. The Change Proficiencies provide the strategies and tools to create movement from one stage to another. The next couple of articles will pair a stage of change with two Change Proficiencies.
Why discuss the stages of change? If you do not know where you are, you cannot plot a course to where you want to arrive. Why Change Proficiencies? The decisions you make will determine if and when you arrive. The proficiencies will help you implement decisions aligned with your desired results.
Remember, to move beyond the paralysis that often accompanies new circumstances, you must stand up to your change. Two proficiencies that play pivotal roles, allowing us to break free and rebuild our confidence, are “Honor What Is” and “Hold onto Self.”
First Stage of Change: “Stand Up To”
Whether you choose to pursue a business opportunity, leadership position or major client or have to face adjustments in responsibilities, management or team, this can be an intense time. You may feel excited, scared, anxious, confused, frustrated or disappointed. To process the change, focus your thoughts on the reality of what is happening, not what you think could happen. Remember, acknowledging what happened does not imply that you accept all the ways it could impact you. Pursue what you can influence and take steps to guide the impact.
You may be saying, “Tell me something I don’t already know!” Still, it can be hard to get started when your thoughts are spinning like the inside of a washer. Precisely how do you focus your thoughts and calm your emotions to regain footing and take the needed actions? That is where the Change Proficiencies come into play.
Change Proficiency #1 — “Honor What Is”
Change frequently requires us to let go of something or someone and move forward to accept or embrace something different. The new circumstances can impact us in different ways, and we may be confronted with uncertainty about how we will handle potential consequences. To make better choices, we must refocus.
“Honor What Is” means acknowledging your thoughts and feelings about a situation. As mentioned, there may be a storm of emotions we face when we first encounter a change. When your feelings intertwine with the facts, it is difficult to move ahead. Focus on “just the facts” to gain access to vital information to make better decisions and create a pathway forward.
Change Proficiency #2 — “Hold Onto Self”
To “Hold Onto Self” is to mentally and physically prepare for challenges we may encounter before we face them. Whether we choose the change, or it was chosen for us, we will eventually face some difficult circumstances as we reach beyond our comfort zone.
To prevent doubts or setbacks from discouraging you, cut off toxic attitudes that undermine your efforts and replace them with evidence-based thoughts that prove you will achieve success. When challenged, search your mental database for a similar experience in which you were victorious. Gather your evidence from previous victories and extract the lessons. This strategy can initiate a protective barrier that shields your mindset, productivity and energy from being corrupted.
While there are more Change Proficiencies to be shared, accelerate your journey as a change expert by applying your knowledge to real situations as they pop up at work and when you communicate with colleagues, team members or customers. It is all about you and your ability to change to incorporate new knowledge or situations better.
The next doubleheader will present the second stage of change, “Accept,” which will be paired with the Change Proficiencies “Be Present” and “Possibility Focused.”
Donna Johnson-Klonsky, MBA, PCC
DJ Consulting Services, Inc.
East Fishkill, New York 12533
djohnson@djcsfirm.com
(845)447-1037
